Later on that day, after Jesus' crucifixion, the disciples had gathered together, but, fearful of the Jews, had locked all the doors in the house. Jesus entered, stood among them, and said, "Peace be with you." Then he showed them his hands and side.
The disciples, seeing the Master with their own eyes, were exuberant. Jesus repeated his greeting: "Peace be with you. Just as the Father sent me, I send you."
Everything was great now. Jesus had just appeared to the disciples in his resurrection body after his crucifixion. The disciples were joyful except for Thomas who wasn't there when it happened.
Thomas was a disciple of great faith. He had earlier described Jesus as, "My Lord, and my God." Not teacher. Not Lord. Not Messiah. But God! It is the only place where Jesus is called God without qualification of any kind. It is uttered with conviction as if Thomas was simply recognizing a fact. You are my Lord and my God! These are certainly not the words of a doubter.
Yet Thomas was not with the other disciples when the resurrected Christ appeared to them. The other disciples told him, "We saw the Master." But he said, "Unless I see the nail holes in his hands, put my finger in the nail holes, and stick my hand in his side, I won't believe it." Here Thomas doubts not only Jesus but the testimony of the other disciples.
We may well wonder what Jesus response to such a bold question will be? Jesus has earlier said: "Ask and you shall receive," but was he talking about asking questions that seem almost sacrilegious? Let's look at the rest of the story for more information.
Eight days later, his disciples were again in the room. This time Thomas was with them. Jesus came through the locked doors, stood among them, and said, "Peace be with you."
Then he focused his attention on Thomas. Jesus did not blame Thomas for doubting. So often the church's handling of doubt is to couple it with disbelief and squash it. But Jesus never condemned Thomas. Perhaps he understood that once Thomas worked through his doubts, he would be one of the surest disciples in all Christendom.
Any person who places himself beyond doubt, places himself above Christ himself. On the cross Jesus cried out, "Father, why have you forsaken me?" At a given time in history, even Jesus had doubts.
Many Christians think the great believers of the faith never doubted. They know about the faith of the famous Christian leaders, but not about their inner struggles. We sing Martin Luther's great hymn, "A Mighty Fortress is Our God," and we suppose he never questioned his faith, but he once wrote, "For more than a week, Christ was wholly lost. I was shaken by desperation and blasphemy against God." The founder of the Presbyterian Church in Scotland, John Knox, wrote of a time when his soul knew "anger, wrath and indignation, which is conceived against God, calling all his promises in doubt." In our own time, Mother Teresa was plagued by doubt for much of her adult life and seldom experienced the peace of Christ but she was still used by God in her life of service to the poor.
I think doubt is a normal part of the spiritual life. In a sense, doubt serves as the fertilizer of faith. My experience has been whenever I have doubts about God or Jesus or the Bible they may lead to a period of disorientation but I come out on the other end with a stronger, surer faith. So I have come to see doubt as a necessary part of faith.
Jesus took seriously Thomas's doubt and in answering him challenged him to come as close to Jesus as he dared. Jesus said to Thomas: "Take your finger and examine my hands. Take your hand and stick it in my side. Don't be unbelieving. Believe."
Thomas said, "My Master! My God!"
Jesus said, "So, you believe because you've seen with your own eyes. Even better blessings are in store for those who believe without seeing." (John 20:19-30)
Like Thomas, we must move beyond doubt to faith. It is all right to doubt, but in our discipleship we should move beyond doubt. Jesus admonished Thomas, "Stop doubting and believe." Unbelief is a normal part of the spiritual life cycle but it is not healthy to get stuck in unbelief. In the early days of John Wesley's ministry he was racked with doubts and uncertainties. So he went to his old friend and mentor Peter Bohler and laid his soul bare. Bohler told Wesley: "Preach faith till you have it, and then, because you have it, you will preach faith." In other words, act as though you have already moved beyond doubt to faith and because you are acting it out it will eventually come to you.
A little boy, growing up in a community where his father served as a Methodist minister was outside playing. He was doing all of the things that a little boy does. He was climbing trees. He was swinging on the swing set and jumping out. He was rolling and playing with his dog. His mother called him for dinner and all of the family gathered at the table. His mother looked at him and said, "Young man, let me see your hands."
There was some rubbing of his hands on his blue jeans before he held his hands up. His mother looked at them and asked, "How many times do I have to tell you that you must wash your hands before you eat? When your hands are dirty, they have germs all over them and you could get sick. After we say the blessing, I want you to march back to the bathroom and wash your hands."
Everyone at the table bowed their heads and the father said the blessing. Then, the little boy got up and headed out of the kitchen. He stopped, then turned and looked at his mother and said, "Jesus and germs! Jesus and germs! That's all I ever hear around here and I haven't seen a one of them."
Jesus told Thomas, "So, you believe because you've seen with your own eyes. Even better blessings are in store for those who believe without seeing."
As a friend poetically put it: "By and by, from the stumble comes the agile, in the fumble lives the catch, the letting go is giving back." (Gari Hatch 04-05-2010) Letting go of our faith is giving it over to God. As many people do, I experienced doubt while I was in college. I gave my doubt over to God, saying, "You handle this, I don't know the answers anymore." As I look back at it now, giving my doubt to God was an act of faith. Over time, God gave me back my faith and it was a more mature and nuanced and subtle faith. I think doubt may lead to greater authenticity in our lives.
The letting go of our faith is giving it back to God and God will take it and bless it and give it back to us. Ginger Smith describes the missional life as "Letting people see, letting people touch, even smell the stench of your sin; all the while communicating the seemingly unfathomable grace of a loving God. This is living a missional life." (Ginger Smith, Online: http://faithwalking.blogspot.com/2010/04/doing-missions-or-living-missionally.html) Jesus meets us wherever we are in our faith journey and invites us to come as close to him as we dare.
Wherever we are in our spiritual lives today, Jesus has a word for us. Whether we are living through a period of great faith or struggling through a time of terrible doubt, Jesus has a word for us today. Jesus message to us is the same one he gave to the disciples who believed and the disciple who had doubted. Here is what Jesus wants to say to you and to me today: "Peace be with you." May you experience the peace of Christ that passes all understanding and all doubt.
- / -
Dr. Jon Burnham preached this sermon at St. John's Presbyterian Church in Houston on April 11, 2010
